At marriage function old people used to pull my cheeks and say “you are the next” now they stopped it. You know why? I started doing the same thing at funerals (death function)

Some times when I cry none see my tears, when I am worried none see my pain, when I am happy none see my smile, but when I talking with one girl all of them are seeing me only.

You can impress everybody by your look and intelligence and if that is not enough, tell them you are my friend.

Height of bad luck- I just wanted to kiss a beautiful, intelligent, smart, cute person on this earth, but what to do my lips can’t touch my cheeks.

What is globalization? Answer: Diana's death Reason-an English princess with a Egyptian boy friend in a germen car driven by a Dutch driver crashes in a French tunnel while being chased by Italian paparazzi on Japanese bikes treated by Portuguese doctor with Brazilian medicine this message was written by an Indian on a Chinese phone smuggling by a Pakistani via Bangladesh. This is globalization.

If you read it, I am smart if you save it, you agree that I am smart if you forward it, you are spreading I am smart, if you delete it, you are jealous.

Best of craziness? Xerox a blank paper. Best of stupidity? Look through a keyhole of glass door. Best of honesty? Pregnant women gets one and half ticket in bus. Best of suicide attempt? A dwarf jumps from the footpath on the road. Best of joblessness? You read the whole sms.

Sweetest kiss- on the fore head, Loveliest- on cheeks, Most and the hottest kiss- on your vehicles silencer try it.

Reaction of girls when they lost their purse: Poor girl- my money. Rich girl- my credit card. Sweet and pretty girl: oh god! Vinith Photo.

What do i do when i see someone xtreeeeeeeeemely good looking? I stare n stare n stare and i smile and smile and when i get tired, I put the Mirror down.

When i send you sms it doesn't mean you have to do the same. you can also send fruit, pizza, chocolates, cds, dvds, etc, cheques & cash is also acepted.

Ages of drinks: 1 to 8 -milk 9 to 13 -horlicks 14 to 25 -beer 26 to 40 -oldmonk 41 to 60 -tonic after 60 once again milk with special music.

World shortest "love story" he tried, she smiled and baby cried.

Secret of being young: Sleep at the right time, Study at the right things, Speak the right ones, Eat the right food and Tell the wrong age.

The sun makes moon shine. Current makes bulbs shine. Wax makes candle shine, but I am really confused, what makes you shine? It’s harpic or domex.

What is the difference between talent and intelligence? Walking on a tight rope above Niagara Falls is talent, not trying that is intelligence.

Class rooms are train. 1st two benches are executives coaches (reserved for VIP) middle two are general compartment and last two are sleeper class.

Parents asked college watch man is this college good? He replied probably the best. I did my engineering here and got immediate placement.

Five hi-tech sardar inventions. 1. Waterproof towel. 2. Solar power torch. 3. Book on how to read. 4. Pedal power wheelchair. 5.umberella with holes to see if its rain.

In future how do I identify your kid in a class room? It’s simple; I will check who’s erasing his notes when teacher is erasing the board.